| ***A POEM THAT I WROTE I CALL IT THE ULTIMATUM***
THESE PAST FEW WEEKS HAVE TRULY TOOK A TOLL ON MY LIFE, ESPECIALLY WHEN IM USING EVERYTHING IN MY POWER TO MAKE IT RIGHT.
I UNDERSTAND THAT IN THIS INEVITABLE OBSTACLE CALLED LIFE ME AND YOU WILL NEVER BE PERFECT AT IT, THATS WHY ITS BEST TO PERSEVERE AND WORK AT IT .
NOW I CANT DO IT ALONE AND THATS A FACT, I DID THAT IN HIGH SCHOOL AND IM NOT GOING BACK.
I ENDURED A LOT OF DRASTIC POSITIVE CHANGES WHEN I WAS WITH YOU, AND I HOPE AND PRAY THAT THE CHANGES WILL CONTINUE.
YOU CLAIM THAT IM DEPRESSING AND THAT MAY BE TRUE, BUT LABELING ME WONT HELP THE SITUATION BOO.
ALTHOUGH I KNOW THAT I DO THE SAME TO YOU, WHICH EXPLAINS WHY WE NEED TO WORK COLLECTIVELY ON THIS ISSUE.
I REALLY AND TRULY WANNA KEEP HOLDING ON, BUT YOURE TELLING ME THAT ITS NOT THERE ANYMORE AND I SHOULD JUST MOVE ON.
YEAH THE TRUTH IS WE PROBABLY WOULD STILL BE FRIENDS AND THATS OK WITH ME, BUT BEING OK ISNT GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME BECAUSE I WANT YOU TO HAVE THE SAME CAPACITY IN MY L-I-F-E.
SOMETIMES I WONDER IF ITS YOU SPEAKING TO ME, OR IS IT SOME OTHER CAT TRYING TO MAKE ME A REPLACE ME.
YOU AND I BOTH KNOW HOW MUCH WE TRUTHFULLY LOVE EACH OTHER, AND HOW WELL NEVER FIND ANYONE QUITE LIKE THE OTHER.
OR IS IT YOUR FRIENDS IN YOUR EAR, SAYING YOU CAN DO WHATEVER CAUSE THE NIGGA ISNT HERE.
ITS BAD ENOUGH THAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH THESE DUDES, AND NOW THAT YOUR FRIENDS IS IN THE PICTURE TELL ME WHAT IM SUPPOSE TO DO.
YOU TELL ME THAT THERE IS NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT, AND IT SEEMS THAT THE MORE FRIENDS YOU MAKE THE MORE I DOUBT.
BUT IM ONLY HUMAN AND HUMANS MAKE MISTAKES, AND TO LEAVE ME THAT WOULD BE A BIG ONE TO MAKE.
I KNOW THAT SOMETIMES I MAY BE PSYCHO OR INSANE AND IT SEEMS LIKE IM FUELED BY PURE HATE, BUT THE VERY THOUGHT OF LOSING YOU IS MORE THAT I COULD TAKE.
NEVERTHELESS I TRUST GOD THROUGH ALL OF IT, EVEN THOUGH IM REALLY GETTING SICK OF THIS SHIT, I MUST KEEP TRYING UNTIL I BECOME SUCCESSFUL AND LEGIT.
SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE T-PAIN BECAUSE I AM REALLY GOING THROUGH A LOT, MY COLLEGE EDUCATION ISNT CLEAR, I HAVE NO CAR, I WANNA LIVE ON MY OWN, I CANT SEE MY SWEETIE AND IM 20 YEARS OLD WITHOUT A JOB.
THEN AGAIN I FEEL LIKE LENNY KRAVITZ CAUSE I REALLY WONDER IF ILL EVER SEE YOU AGAIN, BECAUSE TOMORROW ISNT PROMISED TO YOU, ME, HER, HIM, OR THEM.
OR MAYBE I FEEL LIKE K-E-M YEAH YOU KNOW THAT DUDE NAMED KEM, BECAUSE LOVE HAS BEEN CALLING ME, FOR THE LAST 2 YEARS YOU SEE, AND I KNOW THAT IT JUST A MATTER OF TIME, BEFORE I GET WHATS MINE.
A WISE PERSON ONCE MADE A SONG, TALKING ABOUT IF YOU LOSE A PERSON IT MAY SEEM LIKE THEY ARE GONE, BUT IF HE/SHE COMES BACK TO YOU THEN THEY WAS YOURS ALL ALONG.
YOU SEE IN A PERFECT WORLD EVERYTHING COULD BE SO SWELL, NO SIN, NO HATE, NO DEATH, NO ILLNESS, NO NEGATIVITY, NO CHEATING, NO LYING, NO HYPOCRITES, AND NO HELL.
BUT ON A MORE PERSONAL NOTE OUR LIFE WOULD BE SORT OF LIKE THIS, SERENE WALKS IN THE PARK, STARING AT THE STARS AFTER DARK, MAKING SWEET LOVE IN THE DAY OR NIGHT, AND THATS HOW OUR DAY WOULD END, CAUSE WELL WAKE UP AND DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN.
SOME SAY THAT MATERIAL THINGS AND SEX OVERRIDES ANYTHING IN A RELATIONSHIP, AND IF YOURE NOT GETTING ANY FROM YOUR PRESENT LOVER, YOU OWE IT TO YOURSELF TO GO AND FIND ANOTHER.
THIS IS THE EXACT REASON WHY I DONT GET ALONG WITH SOME INDIVIDUALS ANYWAY, BECAUSE THEY ASSUME THAT YOU MUST SEIZE EVERY OPPORTUNITY INSTEAD OF SITTING BACK AND LOOKING AT THE SITUATION IN A INTELLIGENT WAY.
MOST FEMALES SAY THAT FRIENDS ARE FOREVER AND ALL NIGGAS ARE THE CHEATING TYPE, WELL AFTER READING THIS I TRULY HOPE THAT I HAVE ELIMINATED THAT STEREOTYPE.
BCUZ I HONESTLY FEEL THAT I MAY LOVE MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF, AND I F THIS HASNT EXPRESSED MY LOVE THEN *sighs* I DONT KNOW WHAT ELSE.
I KNOW THAT RIGHT NOW I M NOT ABLE TO GIVE YOU THIS AND THAT, BUT WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW IS THAT IM TRYING AND MY LOVE FOR YOU IS UNCONDITIONAL, SO THAT SHOULD OPPRESS ALL OF THAT.
WEVE TALKED ON SEVERAL DIFFERENT OCCASIONS, NOW AFTER ALL THOSE CONVERSATIONS WHERE I STAND SHOULD BE A CLEAR INDICATION.
WELL THERE IT IS, IVE SAID ALL THAT I CAN SAY, I POURED OUT ALL OF MY FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS ALONG THE WAY.
OVER THE LAST THREE YEARS I HAVE TOLD YOU EACH AND EVERYTHING ABOUT ME, I JUST TRUST, HOPE, AND PRAY THAT YOU HAVE DONE EXACTLY THE SAME FOR ME.
THE BALL IS NOW IN YOUR COURT, THE DECISION IS UP TO YOU, I CAN NO LONGER PROLONG THE SITUATION FROM HAPPENING TO ME OR YOU, ALTHOUGH RIGHT NOW I HATE HOW THE SITUATION HAS PLAYED OUT, I MUST BE A MAN AND MOVE ON WITH OR WITHOUT YOU. SO ARE YOU IN OR ARE YOU OUT?
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